Yo' momma. Blogga.

Once upon an unsettling time, in the shadows of high school hallways littered with dubious teenagers either unproportionally weighted in oversized clothing or barely covered in infinitesimal pieces of fabric revealing unblossomed figures a (lowest) common denominator was found outside of the algebra text books.

Yo' momma jokes.

It didn't matter who yo' momma was [Yo' momma has a bald head with a part and sideburns] or how skinny she was [Yo' momma so fat, when her beeper goes off everyone thinks she's backing up], these jokes were snapped back and forth jokingly until the OH! NO! HE! DIN'Ts! escalated to the point of a teacher breaking up the tasteless, but harmless fun and shooing us juveniles back to the lunch area where we belonged. Sure, we could have easily been completely offended by the insults being hurled each other's way, but really, there was nothing to be offended by. Because the yo' momma jokes? Didn't apply. Weren't applicable. Far from accurate.

Many years later, just as damaged souls like mine have finally fully healed from the true angst of high school (the fist fights that actually did hurt, the insults directed and personalized for me in notes written to me and read in front of the class by a teacher about me and so on) I hear bloggers likening the blogosphere to high school.

"It's just like high school."

"I thought high school was over."

"What is this? High school? Enough drama!"

"I'm seriously considering quitting blogging because it's just like high school."

And I suppose if you read articles like this and this and feel spit on or punched in the face, then sure, you can liken it to high school if that's what high school was like for you too. But I'd venture to guess that for most of us, these articles are nothing but this week's heaping serving of bullshit, a little poke for attention, while never actually applying to you personally.

(Or maybe you're just tired of reading about it on Twitter. I totally hear you.)

But if you think about it, you should never feel like you need to defend what you do on your blog. Your blog is YOUR SPACE to do what you want with it. It's your little chunk of the internet to write whatever you feel like writing, posting whatever photographs you deem appropriate and to touch on any subject you feel worthy of writing about. Whoever doesn't like what you do with YOUR SPACE can click that little red X in the corner and find another blog more suitable to their tastes. There's only a few million blogs out there.

What upsets me the most though are the people who scream FOUL! when this week's article gets published and then twittered and then immediately put on the chopping block... yet they reap the rewards from being quoted or linked to in it.

HOW COULD THEY! (give me all those thousands of hits?) IT'S SO INAPPROPRIATE TO BE SNARKY ABOUT MOMMYBLOGGING! (only I'm allowed to be snarky when I blog about being a mom!) THIS AUTHOR HAS NO IDEA WHAT THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT (but look! I'm in the New York Times! *adds to resume*)

It's like hanging out in the shadows of the high school hallways, waiting for the yo' momma jokes to start and then running to the principal to tell on the mean people who had the nerve to say them.

The blogosphere is not like high school.

In high school, I couldn't leave campus without a written note from my mother. Here on the internet, I'm not confined to one small campus space of the same people every single day. Unless I choose to be. And I can come and go as I please, unplugging, clicking that red X or even unfollowing. Without my mom's permission. And while yes, the blogosphere is chock-full of drama and cattiness like high school was, I'm bringing the same attitude to the blogosphere that I brought to high school: Save the drama for yo' momma.

Honestly, I just don't have the time or energy to be raging mad or feel defeated or worked up and upset over every. single. article. some reporter puts out there. I have other things to do. Like feed those clueless reporters' stereotypes so they have something to throw out there next week. ;)

Comments

[mommadona]

*SnuAP!~ ; )

[Momo Fali]

I'm sending a fist bump from Ohio.

[toastgal]

Sounds like my philosophy on life...don't give a sh*t what people think of me.

[VDog]

Um...I dropped out of high school...what does THAT mean for me & the blogosphere?!?!? Snort.

[Miss]

Dude its the whole "if i get behind and support *this* person, it makes me awesome by association" bandwagon jumping that makes me want to vomit. Get your own damn opinion and oh I don't know, maybe a more interesting LIFE where every single idiotic blog post and shitty web article about mommy blogging doesn't twist your panties so badly that you can't see straight.

And people need to stop virtually humping the legs of people that will never even notice them either.

[tawnya]

LOVE this!

[C @ Kid Things]

Completely agree. I don't even bother reading the articles anymore. They all pretty much say the same thing and then the same people bitch about the same thing and I just don't have the time or energy to care, really.

[avasmommy]

Agree. People seem to forget that, truthfully, they have some control. Take control of: what you read, WHO you read, what you write, where you socialize, etc. And if you don't want to be a part of any of it anymore? That's your right too.

For my part, I'm done with Twitter. Have just had enough of it. Tired of seeing the same old crap, same old drama. I clicked the little red X for the last time today.

Am going back to reading the blogs I like and talking with my friends, and enjoying life.

Am glad I "met" you through twitter. Hope we stay in touch.

[UD {Megan}]

I'm sorry to hear that Jenna. Truly. What about starting from scratch on Twitter and keeping just a few, private followers?

[Peeved Michelle]

Word.

[Peeved Michelle]

And...

My high school years were not filled with drama and my blogging years (eight of them now) haven't been either. I think those ladies crying DRAMA! FOUL! HIGH SCHOOL! need to consider why every aspect of their lives is a nasty soap opera.

Some shitstarters have tried to create drama around me and my blog a couple times in the past, but I won't stand for it. You do what you do, and I do what I do. If you don't like it, you can complain about it all you want, but I don't give a shit.

[krysta]

i think when i complain that blogging is like high school is because there are some big bloggers, mommy or otherwise, who don't give a shit about the little unpopular people... who won't mentor, ect. because instead of it hurting their popularity it hurts their bottom line. also... that while even though the internet lets people be offbeat and you can even be rewarded for it. it seems that only some very phony sunshiny fake people are like they were in high school popular and fake. and i choose not to read those people anymore. like you said i can always use that big red x on the top right in my screen and i do.

[UD {Megan}]

I agree Krysta. But at some point I had to just unfollow/stop reading/etc. I realized quickly that *just like high school* I don't really fit in with them anyway and really, I'd rather have a few great friends than thousands of pretend friends.

[krysta]

megan, you are right... i don't and will never fit in with them and i am right there with you on a few great friends.

that second link you posted on your site about mommy blogger, poop on peeps, suburban mom, and whatever that whole mess is about is frankly quite scary and now i get what your post is really about. and i think i will never compare blogging to high school again. great post.

[Peeved Michelle]

I "don't give a shit about the little unpopular people" but I also don't give a shit about the "big bloggers, mommy or otherwise." I pretty much only give a shit about myself and my blog. I don't have a responsibility to any community. I have readers and I interact with them because I enjoy it. I read other people's blogs because I am entertained by them. Some of those bloggers interact with me and some don't. I don't give a shit about that either.

I wasn't popular in high school and I wasn't unpopular. I had friends in every clique there was. I am not a "big blogger" and I am not one of the "little unpopular people."

I think the people who enjoyed high school the least and the people who compare blogging to high school the most are the ones who were and continue to be on either side of the US vs THEM struggle. There is no US and there is no THEM, there are just people doing their own thing.

[The Mother]

Blogging isn't anything like high school. The internet isn't acutely painful and clique ridden. And no acne, either.

[Apryl's Antics]

I *have* compared the blogging world to high school on occasion, but when I really thought about it, I realized that it was just human nature. I've seen catty, petty behavior in just about every life situation including industry, corporate environments, mom's clubs, the PTA, the HOA, etc. There are always going to be people who scream "foul", become jealous, and/or criticize others for their popularity. In my case I just cut them off. I don't have time for bullshit. I, too, was not part of the 'popular' crowd in HS, but I had close friends who fulfilled me. That, in the end, is all that matters.

[Issa]

Stands up and claps for friend.

Well a one handed clap, since I royally f'ed up my one hand the other day.

Okay fine, whistles for friend. Shit I can't whistle. Dam.

Okay, I give up. But I luff you. :)

[Mrs. Foot]

I think I love you! Ya know, in that completely platonic way ;)

[Amyblam]

Awesome points, and so very true. It's really that simple. If you don't like someone, or what they have to say, you don't have to read it.

[Nancy]

Well said. I've taken my digs from colleagues who just don't get it. But, you know what? It doesn't matter. I GET IT. That's what matters.

[Mommy Blog]

I think i agree very well !!
many people doing there own things ..
and i totally realized it was a kind of human nature!!
thanks for sharing :)